Monday, 30 January 2012

Overdose #4...How To Be Dead...



Beautiful people.
I'm sorry.
I need to stop it.
But its not like I can just see the supposed positives in my life and just forget all the reasons why I'm so miserable.
I overdosed on thursday night.
I wasn't going to because the taste of paracetamol was just disgusting. I kept gagging. But the pain and desire was just too overwhelming.
I overdosed.
I passed out.
Woke up.
Felt incredibly ill ever since, my insides felt like they were falling and I had a really good feeling I thought I was dying. Turns out I wasn't.
On top of that I started getting the flu at the same time and coz I stayed in bed too ill to move my mum kept saying you want paracetamol? umm no I said still tempted that it could finish me off.
On top of that things just seem to be getting worse. My whole "friends" list is dwindling. Even when I told a few ppl I overdosed clearly needing their support they just went on about themselves? wtf I want my friends back! Work makes me mad people who I thought was ok turn out to be bitchy and I'm getting caught up in it :S I got an interview for college but its not the one I wana go to so thats made me sad. And I keep hearing how well people are doing I am happy for them but its making me incredibly jealous as I have nothing going for me.AT ALL. I need a miracle to make me live atm.
6th feb overdose #5...
xx
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3 comments:

  1. Depressed Skinny Mess.30 January 2012 at 20:45

    Please don't do that again, i'm so sorry i haven;t been there for you!!! i love you, my phone isn't working, so if you txt me, i might of not gotten it >< it's ok now though, i think, so please please talk to me <3

    ReplyDelete
  2. Englishrose31 January 2012 at 10:12

    I deleted your number in a crazy haze as u gather i wasnt well

    if uve still got mine text me
    if not remember what i said bwt...everything...everyone...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Katie31 January 2012 at 19:10

    Beautiful! Please email me or text me or whatever!! 07864115111. Please!!!
    Seriously sweet, ive been there. 4 overdoses in 6 months, all hospital admissions, 3 of which almost killed me. All paracetamol. Its very dangerous stuff!! I went for two days after my first one before I even told anyone that I had taken them. You need to get your ass to a hospital before it kills you!!! No one wants that :( :( x x x

    ReplyDelete

I told you to be patient and I told you to be kind...

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